Parenting Blog 2020 Millenial Mother Hood Pre-Adolescence Adolescence
How to get your kids to
A person from the baby boomer generation or really anyone who is older than the person using the word, usually used if said person is being annoying or talking shit about a younger generation.
If you’re reading this you probably have a trouble communicating with your children. Have you ever thought of the day when your child ask for your permission to play outside with the other kids and after a tiring day he/she will tell you all about what happened. “Mom, Michael didn’t find me while I hide under the bush” or “Mom, Ericka kicked me in the eye”. But it’s not the same anymore; so here you are reading this trying to get this energy back like when our children was young.
As our children go older or reached an adolescent period some of them tried to adapt to their new environment which sometimes deviates from our principles. They now have their own “trip sa buhay”. They tend to choose their own style, from how they cut their hair to how they dress. These are the few simple things that you used to do for them but now they do for themselves.
So here are the 3 tips on HOW TO GET YOUR KIDS TO OPEN UP AND NOT TO BE A BOOMER MOM.
1. Spare them some time
No matter how busy you are allow an hour or two for your children, Have a daily recap on how their day went but not too pushy, A simple “how are you?” or “have you eaten yet” is enough, if they don’t really want to talk, just make them feel that you want to get involved in their life and what happens to them is relevant to you.
Don’t expect that this tip will make them open up immediately. This action requires patience and so much understanding. Most importantly, this should be done constantly. This may give a slow progress in building your relationship with your children but it’s a helpful action for starters.
2. Find a common interest
What more to start a topic than finding something to talk about. From that “chismis sa kapitbahay” to the latest showbiz chika. We must establish a strong verbal communication that not only revolves around your child but his/her interests as well. It’s a great platform for you to get and understand his/her opinion without using any force.
Ask about their hobbies and try to involve yourself by asking some time to do it together, without any pressure of course. A simple “Would you like to play with me on the weekend” or “let’s go shopping together” is sufficient. And if your interests are not really in line, support and accept them for who they are and what they want because the only validation they really need is from you.
3. Listen to your children
Remember the days when you used to tell them “Makinig ka sakin, papunta ka palang, pabalik na ako” we need to bury this thought as we aspire not to be a boomer parent. As the saying goes “it’s about the journey” so if you want to be closer to your children, We must listen to the stories they have to tell and try to compromise on their opinions.
Commend their little achievements and don’t invalidate their feelings when they fail. Try to look at the bigger picture that they are doing and trying their best to make you proud. Also, listen to understand rather than to judge.
When things go south make sure their initial reaction is “I have to call my parents” rather than “My parents might kill me”. By listening means not only lending your ears but also your heart. Try to jive into their world that they start to tell you everything from their cute little crushes to their worst heartbreak.
Being a cool parent doesn’t mean letting go of your superiority to your children. You can raise a disciplined and happy child without being too BOOMER.